The Scent of Summer

The wind rose once again, swirling around Caden, making him shiver. He tightened his overcoat and rubbed his hands together as he made his way across the street. He pulled up his sleeve to look at the time. It was almost 10. Caden didn’t know why he was in a rush. He had nowhere to be that Sunday morning, but he felt like he would miss something if he didn’t hurry up. He went through the old, dilapidated gate, patting his pocket to make sure he hadn’t lost the book he had brought.

Caden did not enjoy the atmosphere that a graveyard had. It was filled with history. A history that probably meant nothing to him. But to others. Now he belonged in one of those histories. And he did not like that feeling one bit. He kept walking till he reached the grave he was looking for:

Franklin Miller September 9, 2000- June 3, 2018

Seeing the plaque always filled Caden with an immense sadness. Proof that Franklin was actually gone. He wished that things could have turned out differently. But it was all in the past now. Caden still remembered the first time he saw Franklin. It had been ten years ago…

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It was a sweltering summer day and Caden was watering the plants that he kept around his house. School was out, so the kids were always outside, racing each other on their bikes or playing football. Caden enjoyed watching them while he read the newspaper. It reminded him of his youth. While he was watering the plants, he heard someone cry out,

“Watch out old man!”

He turned around to see a football flying straight at him. He was too shocked to move. But out of nowhere, a kid came running and caught the ball, saving Caden from being hit. He had long curly brown hair that covered his eyes and freckles. Caden wanted to thank him but the kid had already left, shouting sorry as he ran back to his friends.

That was his first introduction of Franklin.

The rest of summer vacation passed by without Caden ever seeing Franklin. Soon the school year began and Caden had to get back to teaching. He didn’t particularly like the job, but it was the only one he could land in that shitty economy. He always enjoyed the first day though. Seeing the new faces filled with excitement, ready to learn. Hopeful for the future. Unaware of the reality.

Caden received a surprise that year when he saw the boy with long curly hair walk into his class. Franklin saw him and gave a wide smile, recognizing him as the ‘old man’ they had nearly killed. Soon the class settled down and Caden asked everyone to introduce themselves. One by one they got up, spoke their names and dreams, and what they hoped to accomplish by the end of the year. Soon, it was Franklin’s turn. He got up.

” My name’s Franklin Miller. Pleased to meetchya!”, he smiled. “I don’t really know what I want to do but I hope I can make some new friends here. As my mamma used to say, you can never have enough of them!”, he grinned at Caden. He smiled back, but deep inside, he felt kind of sorry for him. He had no idea what was in store for him. The world didn’t treat kids like him too well. They always saw only the good in people, even when there was none.

School after the first day never interested Caden that much. It was pretty much the same thing every day. And soon the same kids that declared they would change the world, fell into the same dull routine as Caden.

Wake up. Go to class. Go home. Sleep.

Funny how the teacher and the student had the same schedule.

Franklin was different though. He was always happy. Happy to listen to Caden while he was teaching. He asked plenty of questions and his face always filled up with giddy excitement whenever he understood a new concept. Whenever they had a break or doing lunch, Franklin would take out a book and read. One day Caden walked by him while he was reading in the cafeteria. Franklin looked up to find Caden behind him, trying to see what book he was reading.

“Good afternoon Professor! Hope you’re having a good day.” “Oh I’m doing good. Thank you. Mind if I sit?” Franklin gestured at the table,” Not at all.”

Caden took his tray and sat in the seat opposite to Franklin. “So…what are you reading?”, Caden inquired. Franklin closed the book and showed the cover to Caden.

Peter Pan.

Caden’s face lit up. ” I loved that book as I kid. Man does that take me back…”, he gazed off into the distance, reminiscing over better times. ” My friends and I used to pretend to be the Lost Boys and ran all over the neighborhood fending off Captain Hook.”

Franklin laughed out loud. Caden looked at him,” What’s so funny?” Franklin tried to stifle a laugh but to no avail,” Nothing. It’s just that..it’s hard to imagine you running around with a stick chasing an imaginary Captain Hook.” He burst out laughing.

Caden gave in and let out a chuckle.

” I guess you’re right” Caden never imagined he would bond with one of his students like this. He never considered himself to be a good teacher. He took the job just for the money. But that didn’t mean he couldn’t make friends. And so Franklin became his first friend in school.

Caden was Franklin’s class teacher for the next five years. But even after that they kept in touch. It really was a peculiar relationship, as Caden looked back at it. He was well over 50 and Franklin was around 12 when they first met. Yet he always considered him to be a friend first rather than a student. Franklin would come to him whenever there was something he wanted to discuss, whether it be a book or his future. During the time Caden had known Franklin, Franklin had grown tremendously. He was now a well built six footer, but he still had that long curly hair and that infectious smile. He was around that age now, where people start thinking about going to college, what they want to do in life, and how they plan to get there. Caden was slightly worried about Franklin. Whenever, he asked him about him, he would divert the conversation and talk about something else. One day Caden kept pestering him about it and Franklin finally snapped.

“Why does it matter! Why do I have to do something! Can’t I just live?”, Franklin shouted. Caden looked baffled,”What do you mean just live? You’re so smart. There’s so much you can do for society….” “I don’t have any obligation towards it. Why should I? I just…. I just want to live life on my own terms.”, Franklin muttered. “So then, what do you want to do?” “I told you, I don’t know. Why is that such a problem?” Caden tried to explain patiently,” Everyone your age has a plan. They know what they want to do. You can’t think that life is always going to be like this. I won’t be here forever to help…” ” I know!” Franklin shouted. ” Which is why I just want to enjoy it while I can. ” Franklin looked out the window. The birds were chirping and the sunlight glared through the window, casting a nice glow over the room.

” I just want to enjoy that blue sky every day of my life”

Franklin turned towards Caden. “If you know, then tell me. What should I do with my life?” Caden stumbled over his words,” We..well I have no way of knowing. Only you know what you should do….” ” Exactly……” Franklin put his head in his hands. “Professor….I’m so confused.”, and he began to cry.

Is it selfish to choose the way I live my life?

Franklin left after some time and all that remained was a thick silence. Caden looked out the window. It had begun to rain and the birds had stopped chirping. Suddenly, he noticed a black notebook lying on the table. Franklin had probably left it there and forgotten about it. Caden picked it up and glanced through it. It didn’t take long for Caden to realize that it was Franklin’s diary. He never knew that Franklin had maintained one. Curious, he stopped at a random page and began to read…

May 2, 2015 Mom’s begun to drink too. I guess the pressure is finally getting to her. Father left a long time ago, but I’m glad he left. I thought that would solve all our problems. It didn’t. It replaced a belt with a cane. I try to bear the pain, but I still cry. Mother continues to beat me, and I continue to cry. I look out the window of my bedroom. I can still feel the scars. But I’m not angry at Mother. I could never be angry at her. After all she’s done for me. I’ll bear it. Until Mother gets better.

Mom…please come back.

June 24, 2016 I saw father’s picture in the paper. It seems he’s doing well, and that thought fills me with rage. Why is it that bad people prosper? But there’s nothing I can do about it. Peter Pan and the Lost Boys keep me company late at night and I have so much fun reading it. I’m really glad Caden bought me a copy of the book. I wish I could talk to Caden about everything that’s happening, but I don’t want to worry him.

I’m tired…I don’t want to suffer anymore. I just want it all to disappear. I just want to live without doing anything. I just want to be happy. I’ve already lost my childhood. I don’t want to lose my future too.

I want many things…but it seems like I won’t get any of them.

Is it selfish to choose the way I live my life?

January 13,2017 I don’t care anymore. Just living causes me pain and I don’t know how to fill this gaping hole in my heart. I won’t be able to fool Caden for long. I suspect that he already knows something is up.

I miss the summer days. Lying down in the grass, raising our hands trying to touch the clouds. How long ago was that? I can’t remember. All I want is to relive those memories. Those days of old, where everything made sense and I had a place where I felt like I belonged.

June 3,2018 Dear Caden, I’m sorry for tricking you, but this was my burden to bear. I truly enjoyed the time we spent together. You gave me a reason to wake up in the morning, and for that I’m grateful. I tried to get out of the well that I found myself in, but it was too hard. There were so many things I wanted to ask you. What did you want to do with your life? Did you have dreams, or did you forget that when you became an adult? I don’t think I ever had a dream, because I couldn’t afford one. It seems like I missed so many opportunities to get to know you better. And I’ll regret that forever. So before I go I just want to say one last thing.

Summer is finally here. Maybe now I can enjoy that blue sky.

Thank you for being my friend.

Caden closed the book and kept it on his desk. The rain began to pour down as he fell into his chair and broke into sobs.

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The wind rose once again, swirling around Caden, making him shiver. How long had he been standing there? The sky was now a beautiful orange and the stars had begun to twinkle. Caden took out the book he had brought and laid it on the grave. He stepped back from the grave and looked up at the stars. He closed his eyes.

He could almost smell the scent of summer.

#writing #depression #society #story #Literature #storytelling #Fiction